A lot of the time when people give advice intended to relieve anxiety, they suggest doing “relaxing” things like drawing, painting, knitting, taking a bubble bath, coloring in one of those zen coloring books, or watching glitter settle to the bottom of a jar.
This advice is always well-intentioned, and I’m not here to diss people who either give it or who benefit from it. But it has never, ever done shit for me, and this is because it goes about resolving anxiety in the completely wrong way.
THE WORST THING YOU CAN DO when suffering from anxiety is to do a “relaxing” thing that just enables your mind to dwell and obsess more on the thing that’s bothering you. You need to ESCAPE from the dwelling and the obsession in order to experience relief.
You can drive to a quiet farm, drive to the beach, drive to a park, or anywhere else, but as someone who has tried it all many, many times, trust me–it’s a waste of gas. You will just end up still sad and stressed, only with sand on your butt. You can’t physically escape your sadness. Your sadness is inside of you. To escape, you need to give your brain something to play with for a while until you can approach the issue with a healthier frame of mind.
People who have anxiety do not need more time to contemplate, because we will use it to contemplate how much we suck.
In fact, you could say that’s what anxiety is–hyper-contemplating. When we let our minds run free, they run straight into the thorn bushes. Our minds are already running, and they need to be controlled. They need to be given something to do, or they’ll destroy everything, just like an overactive husky dog ripping up all the furniture.
Therefore, I present to you:
THINGS YOU SHOULD NOT DO WHEN ANXIOUS
–Go on a walk
–Watch a sunset, watch fish in an aquarium, watch glitter, etc.
–Go anywhere where the main activity is sitting and watching
–Draw, color, do anything that occupies the hands and not the mind
–Do yoga, jog, go fishing, or anything that lets you mentally drift
–Do literally ANYTHING that gives you great amounts of mental space to obsess and dwell on things.
THINGS YOU SHOULD DO WHEN ANXIOUS:
–Do a crossword puzzle, Sudoku, or any other mind teaser game. Crosswords are the best.
–Write something. It doesn’t have to be a masterpiece. Write the Top 10 Best Restaurants in My City. Rank celebrities according to Best Smile. Write some dumb Legolas fanfiction and rip it up when you’re done. It’s not for publication, it’s a relief exercise that only you will see.
–Read something, watch TV, or watch a movie–as long as it’s engrossing. Don’t watch anything which you can run as background noise (like, off the top of my head, Say Yes to The Dress.) As weird as it seems, American Horror Story actually helps me a lot, because it sucks me in.
–Masturbate. Yes, I’m serious. Your mind has to concentrate on the mini-movie it’s running. It can’t run Sexy Titillating Things and All The Things That are Bothering Me at the same time. (…I hope. If it can, then…ignore this one.)
–Do math problems—literally, google “algebra problems worksheet” and solve them. If you haven’t done math since 7th grade this will really help you. I don’t mean with math, I mean with the anxiety.
–Play a game or a sport with someone that requires great mental concentration. Working with 5 people to get a ball over a net is a challenge which will require your brain to turn off the Sadness Channel.
–Play a video game, as long as it’s not something like candy crush or Tetris that’s mindless.
THINGS YOU SHOULD DO DURING PANIC ATTACKS ESPECIALLY:
–List the capitals of all the U.S. states
–List the capitals of all the European countries
–List all the shapes you can see. Or all the colors.
–List all the blonde celebrities you can think of.
–Pull up a random block of text and count all the As in it, or Es or whatever.
Now obviously, I am not a doctor. I am just an anxious person who has tried almost everything to help myself. I’ve finally realized that the stuff people recommend never works because this is a disorder that thrives on free time and free mental space. When I do the stuff I listed above, I can breathe again. And I hope it helps someone here too.
(Now this shouldn’t have to be said but if the “do nots” work for you then by all means do them. They’ve just never worked for me.)
This would’ve been great an hour ago
If your anxiety includes rapid heartbeat for no reason then it may help to exercise! It helps for me because I’m focused on whatever moves I’m doing and breathing, and it gives my heart rate a reason to be that high so that I can start the slow cooking down process and (hopefully) bring that heart rate down with it. Look up a quick cardio workout on YouTube or something and just do it in your room!
This is so, SO true.
All ‘doing something relaxing’ ever did for me was give my brain MORE free time to FREAK THE FUCK OUT.
I like how this boil down to grabbing something then tell the brains weasels to GO FETCH YOU PIECES OF SHIT
Summarized : Ana is a competitive dancer and a dance teacher. She was brutally assaulted on her way home. She was raped, stabbed and beaten. Ana suffered physical trauma as well as deep psychological trauma. She will be spending another month in a hospital, which leaves her with no income. Her friends and family are hoping Ana will be able to fullfil one of her biggest dream – to compete in a Latin dance competition abroad in Vienna in 6 months. She also needs to cover her medical bills, therapies and basic necessities.
This is Ana, my best friend of 12 years. She is an amazing competitive Latin and Ballroom dancer who won numerous competitions and awards. She is also one of the kindest, most caring people I know. When we first met, 12 years ago, I didn’t speak a word of English as I am a daughter of Czech immigrants who moved to New York a month before Ana and I met. She was the first person in this strange new place who made me feel like I belonged. Every day she would help me with homework and practise English with me. After 3 months of her constant help, I became nearly fluent.
A week ago, something unthinkable happened to Ana.
Women pay more for products. Men pay more for clothing.
Do men really pay more for clothes?
Yea, seriously. Shirts, sneakers, jeans, socks…etc. Ask your male friends how much they pay for a pair of descent jeans. It’ll blow your mind.
At least their pants have fucking pockets tho
“Men pay more for clothing.”
(Target)
Are you sure?
Are you
(Walmart)
ABSOLUTELY SURE??
BECAUSE I’M NOT ENTIRELY CONVINCED
LIKE AT ALL
THAT MEN HAVE IT HARDER
(Victoria’s Secret)
OH AND SHOULD I BRING UP PANTIES WHILE I’M AT IT? I am a firm believer of the “fuck you, I’ll wear briefs that don’t give me a wedgie, I don’t care if they’re not sexy” policy, but a lot of women are expected to wear panties and thongs because GASP WOMEN MUST BE BEAUTIFUL AT ALL TIMES. Here’s a screenshot of some Victoria’s secret panties!
Wow. It’s almost as if there’s a pattern here.
Women are expected to buy more clothing, and literally all of it is more expensive, so fuck all of you.
*HAMMERS THE REBLOG BUTTON*
Fucking infuriating. And, NO ONE pays more for clothes than fat women. Tired of it.
Have you ever stepped on a Torrid? $50-$80 for a blouse.
^^^^^
Yup it totally gets more costly when you’re not model thin.
Woah
I’m here to confirm the fat girl comment…. decent fitting, CUTE plus size shit is just expensive as fuck.
As a trans person who has shopped for both mens and womens clothes, I can confirm that womens clothes are A LOT more expensive than mens – and women are expected to buy more as well. I don’t mean that women are expected to love shopping and want loads of outfits (although that expectation certainly contributes), I mean that womens shirts are sheer and they are expected to wear stuff underneath them, while mens shirts are opaque. Womens tops are flimsy so they have to wear cardigans or jumpers, mens tops are thicker and they can get away without. Womens clothes don’t have pockets so they’re forced to buy bags to carry stuff.
There is only one single exception to this that I can found. And that is underwear. I don’t mean lingerie like the Victoria’s Secret stuff above, I mean basic knickers vs basic boxers. A multipack of 7 knickers from Primark costs about £4. A multipack of 3 boxers from Primark costs £7. That is literally the only exception that I’ve found.
Of course, considering that a lot of women also wear bras that tiny concession ceases to be a factor once you add in the cost of a bra. Even a basic Primark one costs about £6 for one. That basic bras aren’t supportive, comfortable, long lasting, or anything else you need from a bra.
So yeah, men might pay a lot for their clothes. But women pay a lot more.
If you’re skeptical about the Pink Tax, you can do your own test at a local store. That’s literally what I did here, complete with photographic evidence of the pricing:
Don’t let anyone forget the fact that the President of the United States skipped out on visiting military graves for Armistice Day’s 100th anniversary.
Because of rain.
He has golfed in the rain. He was inaugurated in the rain. Other leaders–and his own subordinates–made it out there in the rain.
President Trump, though? The man who loves our troops and our country? Yeah, it’s weird that he didn’t go to the ceremony and chose to stay in his hotel room. He left our country on Veteran’s Day weekend to visit Paris for the reunion, but could not be bothered to face a little rain in order to pay his respects to the troops.
He forgets the names of the fallen. He cuts funding for veteran welfare programs. He sends our soldiers to the border for needless exercises in intimidation. Then he claims that others are weak on the military and don’t respect our troops?
What a joke.
Oh, and when I say “don’t let them forget”, I mean “every time some alt-right nutjob comes at you, hit them with that question”.
Also, if you need to cite facts:
An hour. This isn’t a “scheduling thing”, this is something that should have been planned. At the least, the President doesn’t have staff who know how to plan a trip.
The thing is, this drags military respect into the conflict.
If you want bonus points, remind them of the time Hillary got pneumonia from attending a 9/11 memorial.
Never trust someone who fetishizes the military in one breath and spits on veterans in the next; just saying.
wupacing 