when your spouse catches your child in a ridiculous lie such as claiming they didnt eat the entirety of a bag of sugar despite the evidence, it is YOUR job, as co-parent and a bringer of chaos, to say: i believe her. she didn’t do it. that sugar could’ve came from anywhere. let’s go baby, let’s go find the criminal who framed you. what a dastardly crime to commit against a child.
now…as someone who raised their younger sister: 9 out of 10 times, this will end in a tearful confession. your faith in her will be it. and you have to act HEARTBROKEN. you have to look at the dog and ask, mournfully, “did you know? did you know?”
Japan’s complete lack of understanding of declining birth rates in relation to its work culture reminds me a lot of how America has an assumption that millennials are killing industries when the truth is they are more frugal because of a lack of funds.
Both come from a conservative mindset that neglects the impact that a toxic work culture can have on society.
A 80+ hour work week in order to maintain financial stability isn’t exactly a solid ground to date people and eventually build a family from a healthy relationship.
A workforce comprised of 20 somethings that make between 20-40k a year in entry positions isn’t a good ground to build a reliable consumer base when a huge chunk of that is going to rent, utilities, car payments, and student loans.
This is a fascinating connection, you should write a paper on this
I am convinced that, in general, people want to have families. Many, if not most, would be happy to raise children. But in order to have children and raise them, especially to do so well, people need happy, stable relationships, financial security and time to devote to – you know – actually raising the child. You need both money and time to do that.
If people are not given the time and means to be able to create social connections and strong relationships, to devote to parenthood and family, then they are not going to do it. How can they?
I mean from an even more simplistic point these both represent the failures of the current capitalist class to learn from simple past lessons. – labor power needs time and resources/money to recuperate to do the things that allow them to be productive at work and to reproduce the next class of workers
Me: I don’t know if I ever want to be pregnant, I’d rather adopt a kid or two that are a bit older
Someone: Are you SURE? Older adoptees present UNIQUE CHALLENGES
Me: We are discussing human beings not digital pets
Literally every child every born and/or parented presents unique challenges. It’s like people are unique individuals…..or something………….
An amazing and revolutionary concept
When people ask me, “Why do you want to adopt teenagers?” I always answer, “Because you asked like that.”
I’m real over it.If I become a foster mom to a 17 year old kid and I get the privilege of the option to adopt them? You better believe I am legally making that kid mine.
“They’ll be a legal adult in no time, why spend the money to adopt? They’ll be aged out of the system.”
There’s no aging out of family, Marvin.
“They might be rebellious or smoke or do drugs or steal things! What if they won’t listen to you?”
Then I guess I’ll have to step up and do some fruxking parenting, Stanley.
“You want to adopt problem children then?”
All. Children. Are. Problem. Children. If you’re not prepared to deal with the fact that at some point, any child ever, whether you birthed them yourself or adopted them at any age, could become a problem? Then you are NOT ready to have children, and should really just step off and let the people who actually want to be parents live in peace with their kids.
also re: teens sitting around with their tablets and smartphones
like, if a kid can access the internet (with some privacy still) while also sitting in the same room as their parents, honestly that’s better and more social than what I did as a teenager, which was hole up in my room at my desktop computer that I couldn’t move anywhere else in the house
mostly what I see from the teens in my family is they will sit and scroll through their phone, but if something interesting starts happening, or a new person enters the room, or they see something cool they want to share, they look up and interact again, because they’re sitting right there with everyone else.
that is waaaay more social than 2002 me, hunched over my desktop for hours and only seeing my mom in passing when I went to microwave a burrito at 1am. way, way more social.
My whole family does this now. We’re all in the same room, but each on a phone, tablet, or laptop. Certain poop heads will shake their heads at how technology is dividing us.
But
Like
What do they think families have done for since ever? Talk constantly while playing educational board games every evening? No.
They’d each be reading, or sewing, or writing letters or some shit, and mostly sat quietly near each other but not bothering each other.
yes this
It reminds me of the whole “omg people on trains used to TALK to each other” argument. No, they didn’t. They read the newspaper or stared straight ahead avoiding eye contact.
People have been finding reasons not to talk to each other for centuries.
In 1982, I was pretty much nose-in-book continuously, Dad might be face-in-paper or yardwork, Mom was sewing or reading or watching shitty daytime television.
1984, we added an Atari to the mix, and Mom and I often took turns on it, plus all the things we’d done before.
Circa 1990, there were two DOS computers in the house, plus a video game console. I might be on the console while Mom and Dad played solitaire.
1995, we got a Windows 95 computer, and Mom and I spent a lot of time playing Civilization, Warcraft (Warcraft 1 and 2) and Myst, Dad would play Solitaire on the old computer, and we still read a lot, but there was also a bunch of time spent on Compuserve. Mom still sewed, Dad still read the paper, etc. etc.
I was lonely pretty much most of my life except for a little window at college until the internet showed up. I haven’t been that lonely since.
wupacing 