Whenever Hagrid finally decides to retire as Care of Magical Creatures professor you can bet your last knut that Charlie Weasley flies back to England the following week excitedly waving his resume and recommendation letters from no less than two Scamanders and the Minister of Magic, Hermione Granger.
I’m pretty sure he would also have recommendation letters from Rubeus Hagrid, the retiring professor, Harry Potter, the Boy Who Lived and a very confusing one from Puddlemere United player, Oliver Wood, saying that he was one of the best Seekers he had ever seen.
Not to mention the fact that he flies back to England not on a broomstick or any other normal form of transportation, but landing on the Hogwarts grounds on the back of the largest dragon anyone has ever seen.
Reblogging again for that last addition.
Charlie: *glides in on a dragon* HELLO HIRE ME
Everyone: What the fuck
Ron: (in the background, mortified) this is normal
Not just any large dragon, either. A huge Norwegian Ridgeback that immediately curls itself around Hagrid’s Hut once Charlie dismounts. And it purrs when Hagrid dodders out of his hut to see what’s going on.
a muggleborn student coming to hogwarts with a thermos flask and filling it with tea in the morning so it stays hot all day and their pureblood friends are like “whoa what spell did you use for that” and they’re like “?????? it’s just a thermos???” and all the pureblood students start pointing their wands at cups and saying “THERMOS”
THERMOS
plot twist: it works, mugs suddenly start keeping tea at the perfect temperature for the caster all day. students in muggle studies start experimenting with other muggle jargon and a new generation of magic spells are born, propelling the stagnated wizard community into the technological age
*points wand at book* KINDLE!!!! *book propels itself into fireplace and bursts into flames* I FUCKED UP I FUCKED UP
Just like Slughorn, Albus Dumbledore collects people. Only, instead of focusing on those with influence, he looks to the outcasts.
The expelled half-giant. The young werewolf. The repentant Death Eater.
He protects them and gives them a second chance. All he asks in return is their loyalty.
And, if on occasion he requests that they undertake a certain task, invoking their debt of gratitude – well, that is no more than he is owed.
He once thought to add a certain disowned Black to his collection, but quickly realised his mistake.
Sirius is not an outcast, but a rebel. He knowingly chose his path, and chooses what price he is willing to pay for it. He refuses to be used.
So Albus Dumbledore abandons him.
Who gave you the RIGHT?
Dumbledore knows Sirius’s loyalty lies with Harry instead of him, and he has no use for someone who is not willing to follow his orders without question.
Ooooohoo if there’s ever a post that fits my aesthetic…
okay but then where does Harry himself fit into this collection? Is he an outcast because he is “the Boy Who Lived”?
Nooonono, my friend, that’s what makes this post so beautiful. Because it fits the meta I’ve been trying to get people to accept for years.
Harry was an outcast due to a childhood filled with abuse and neglect.
Vernon made him an outcast by dismissing his claims of magic, berating him, locking him in a CLOSET and putting bars on his window, and let’s face it, even though her editor made her cut it out, Jo intended for there to be physical abuse.
Petunia made him an outcast by enabling and contributing to this abuse, as well as making Harry do dozens of chores while doting on Dudley.
Dudley made him an outcast by bullying him and threatening any students at school who wanted to be his friends.
And the rest of the wizarding world made him an outcast when they bullied him for being an outsider.
Harry James Potter became an outcast the moment he was placed with The Dursleys.
I’ve just come to the realisation that Hermione Granger probably memory charmed her parents and packed them off to Australia long before she told Harry and Ron she’d done it at the beginning of Deathly Hallows.
She literally never goes home from Goblet of Fire onwards, spending her summers with the boys instead. In GoF she’s remarkably blase about her teeth, something her dentist parents would have noticed and felt hurt about.
If I were to guess, I’d say she probably did it after the wizarding world cup when she’d seen exactly how the wizarding world treats muggles and decided not to let that happen to her folks. Hermione knows which way the wind is blowing and gets in early. She’d be more than capable of doing it.
…Oh my God.
hermione is fucking ruthless and i will fight anyone who tells me otherwise
that was her “negative” gryffindor trait
was she incredibly brave and courageous and loyal? yes
but she was also vicious and violent and trapped a woman as a beetle in a jar for over a year because she pissed her off
hermione granger looked at the world, and looked at her magic, and looked at everyone else’s magic, and seemed to come to the conclusion that reality had better shut the fuck up and behave itself or she’d make it.
of all the kids, i think she’s dumbledore’s successor, not harry.
See this is why I don’t like it when people try and pass her off as this flawless pure sweet angel. Like no, she’s emotional, loud, angry, brash, and vindictive, and she’s absolutely awesome just like that. Don’t woobify her.
The Fidelius Charm is absolutely terrifying to me. Like, there is a lot of scary stuff in Harry Potter. A lot. But a spell that literally hides a secret in someone’s soul? That rubs me more wrong than headcanoning that Voldemort doesn’t have finger or toenails.
I wonder if a Fidelius Charm can be forcefully cast. You know, you force or trick someone into telling you their secret so that *you* become the Secret-Keeper, and then they can no longer pass it on themselves? Imo the best way to trick them would be guzzle a Polyjuice Potion and pretend to be whoever it is the charm is supposed to be cast on, and as for force. Well. Family threatening I assume.
Imagine that though! You make someone your Secret-Keeper by mistake, and you can’t do shit about it. Only they can tell other people about anything pertaining the secret. Pretty spooky.
Also, interesting thing to note. When the spell is used to protect a location, that particular place becomes invisible, unplottable, intangible, and soundproof. Do you think that could work for a person, too? I bet it would. Though making someone the Secret-Keeper for a living being could have some serious shit consequences, because if the Secret-Keeper dies without divulging the secret, then the secret dies with them. Imagine how many places and people that’s happened to in Harry Potter! Eternally invisible, unplottable, intangible, and soundproof. Though for people, I’d think it’d be more along the lines of instantly forgetting the person they see. Like the Silence from Doctor Who!
Great way to hide things you don’t want found; great way to drive someone batshit insane.
(Where am I going with this? I’m trying to figure out how exactly Harry The Most Famous Wizard in the World Potter could go a decade without anyone knowing where he is. Solution? Fidelius Charm. Hermione and Ron were probs his Secret-Keepers until he decided it was time to come back.)
I wonder, could you make a baby a Secret-Keeper? That would be hella clever. Or, oooooh, split a Secret-Keeper’s soul into Horcruxes. Y E s! I am getting way too deep into this, slow down brain.
Eventually they just started calling each other the names the others hated the most anyway, and then it stuck, and well, the names were so childish and they’re sixteen years old! No one’s going to think they’re these people ten years from now. Nope. Not happening.
I just had a scene for my POA AU “because he strayed across the path” (x) come into my head. See, there’s an earlier scene during Gryffindor Quidditch practice where Oliver Wood quickly switches to fudge instead of fuck because Harry is standing next to him.
(Except Harry is thirteen and his best friend is Ron Weasley, so this was kind of unnecessary. The older sibling in me will probably always find adults / older teenagers trying like heck not to swear around the littlies who definitely know the swear words absolutely hilarious.)
So, now, I need a scene where Oliver actually swears and then immediately cuts himself off because he’s remembered Harry. Only, for some reason or another, Harry gets annoyed or feels that they’re babying him.
“I’ve heard the word fuck before,” Harry muttered.
Silence fell over the team.
Then Fred Weasley gasped dramatically and whirled on Oliver with his hands on his hips. “Oliver Wood,” he said, in a voice so uncannily like his mother that even George, who had also put his hands on his hips, seemed unnerved. “How dare you corrupt this innocent boy!”
Harry didn’t know if Oliver had met Molly Weasley before, but Oliver looked appropriately bewildered. “I didn’t… er… Hang on a minute, you-”
“You’re supposed to be setting an example!” Fred cried.
“I am!” Oliver insisted hotly.
“You’re an example of something, alright. Not sure if it’s good,” Alicia mumbled to Katie, who giggled.
Oliver looked desperately to his vice-captain for assistance, but Angelina only shook her head at him in great shame. She was too solemn to possibly be doing anything but pulling his leg.
McGonagall: Yes, that’s what we’re doing. In our very limited free time, we took a class on a very outdated, very unnecessary form of communication just so we could talk about you in front of you.
[later]
McGonagall, to Flitwick: That’s… exactly what we did.
wupacing 