This is an illustration I did for my friend, Dai’s, PhD thesis. A part of his thesis involved a study around how some gay men (particularly those of a minority status) negotiate being gay outside of mainstream gay culture. One story that really stood out to me as being quite unique and touching involved a middle-aged fellow who has never been intimate with another man, doesn’t necessarily identify as being gay, but spends his days knitting baby socks on park benches and on the train as a way to perform his ‘gayness’. As he still lives at home with an extremely conservative family this is essentially the only way he knows to express his sexuality.
I literally had a friend say this the other day while having dinner with him and his husband.
“Listen.” He said. “I served in the military. 10 years in the army, and had to keep my mouth shut and pretend. I had to pretend to everyone, until I just got sick of it and decided fuck you all. I haven’t been nice in years. Everyone saying I should shut up can kiss my ass.”
If people wanted nice gay people they should have been nicer to them.
IF PEOPLE WANTED NICE GAY PEOPLE THEY SHOULD HAVE BEEN NICER TO THEM
Oh wow I forgot about this. I need to tell Ron he’s Tumblr famous now.
Ron says to tell all the pissed off cockroach motherfuckers that he and his husband Ryl are now your Angry Gay Dads.
In 1941, Manfred Lewin (left), a young Jewish man living in Nazi Berlin, made a small book of poems and pictures. He gave this book to his boyfriend, Gad Beck (right), as they waited out an air raid together.
Today, The United States Holocaust Memorial Museum has a beautiful online exhibit where you can view this book in its entirety, along with translations and additional information. It’s a wonderful little piece of queer history, and I encourage you all to check it out here.
i really want to normalise the idea amongst lgbt youth that its okay to switch labels as you further understand your identity. you’re not a traitor or a fake if you realise you’re bi instead of a lesbian, or if you’re a trans woman instead of a gay man. it’s really difficult and scary to be lgbt and it’s doubly hard to deal with a shifting identity amongst all that so… be kind to yourself. you’re learning and figuring yourself out and nothing is set in stone. let yourself figure out what feels most comfortable to you. and for those who are secure in their lgbt identities, particularly adults, don’t make kids feel bad for switching between labels. we’ve all had identity crises in our lives, so provide support and understanding rather than unforgiving attitudes.
this post is not an excuse to jump on the “of course you can’t label yourself at a young age” bandwagon either. young people who stick with and feel comfortable in an identity from an early age are just as valid as you are.
Additionally, on the other side of this – if you know someone who switches labels, it’s also your job to not make them feel like a traitor or a fake. If you’re their friend or you say you support them, then be their friend and support them. If you don’t understand how they could say they were one thing however long ago and now it’s something different, this is your chance to learn, not reject.
And if they later choose to go back to their original label, then they still weren’t faking it. Those were the feelings they had at the time.
ive been reading a book that basically explains how so-called “brain differences” between the genders is the result of gendered socialization and not the cause of it. i honestly expected the book to be very cis-centric but its actually the opposite, the author stresses that testimony from trans ppl is actually indispensable because we’ve, in a sense, “lived both experiences”
more cis feminists should have this mindset
one of the first examples that she uses to introduce her point about how perception by others can shape a person’s performance actually uses a trans woman. it explains that as a certain trans woman became to be seen as a woman more and more frequently, the ppl arond her eventually started viewing her as being ill equipped for tasks that they did not bother her about pre-transition. eventually she even found herself underperforming in these tasks herself.
I knew it was this book before I’d finished reading the first two lines. Honestly this book is indispensible if you want to debunk any gender determinism people claim is science. I can’t recommend it enough.
(Bonus bonus: I am myself a neuroscientist, and the old white men mentioned above – who are not – could not have missed the point harder if they’d actively tried. Which. Maybe?)
This is a good illustration of Tumblr’s brand of social justice
and he still manged to include the q slur lmao
You are literally this person
To people in the notes going “but he should still paint over qu**r because it’s a slur”: I dare you to walk into your nearest LGBTQ Center and demand that any and all mention of “queer” be removed from its displays, literature, and programs. Go ahead and tell me what they say to you. I’ll wait.
I believe I will just queerly reblog this without further queer comment.
wupacing 