Thor, Asgardian and naive: Loki, I’ve been meaning to ask. Are you and the Grandmaster involved in a… romantic relationship?
Loki, also Asgardian, naive to a degree: No, we have a mutually beneficial relationship that means I get whatever I desire from him, like wealth, and he gets whatever he desires from me.
Bruce Banner, Midgardian, knows exactly what a sugar daddy is: oh sounds great
Look at Hulk’s room. I’ll I’m saying is that he didn’t get all that from just winning in the arena and you know it.
you come into my home, look me in the eyes, imply hulk fucked the grandmaster,
Okay this has popped up on my dash again and I resisted the urge the first few times but now I can’t.
In college I was friends with a bunch of exchange students and went to a party off campus with them. After a couple hours the owners of the apartment called it a night but my friends wanted to continue to hang out. One of the other exchange students volunteered his place. Only problem was there were 10 of us and our only ride was a honda civic.
So we had a 6 foot tall Swedish dude with two Japanese girls on his lap in the front passenger seat, three Saudi students and me sitting in the back seat with two Thai students sitting on our laps and a Mexican-American woman driving.
I being paranoid asked, “What do we do if we get pulled over?”
The driver tries to look at me, “Do you speak another language or can you fake Swedish?”
“No, but I know ASL.”
She nodded, “Okay so the plan is if we get in trouble, no one speaks English and you’re Deaf.”
That was our plan guys.
This is the best comment I’ve ever had on this post.
For all the people IMMEDIATELY calling me out re: a Mr Rogers fic-
So I think there are three ways this could go, and they’re all interesting, so the question is which is more interesting.
One is the one I think I’ve seen before, where Steve was somehow related to Fred- a cousin or nephew or something- and when he’s out of the ice he decides to take over the family business. I feel like this is the least interesting option, because other people have already done it before, especially between Avengers and Cap2.
Another is an AU where Steve was ALWAYS Mr Rogers. Like, he never went into the ice; instead, he landed the plane safely, had that date with Peggy and ended up being a crusader for public television. Probably his Neighborhood of Make Believe has thinly-disguised Howlies and the most-used one is Bucky and every episode is really fun for kids but if you know Cap canon it will stab you in the heart.
And the THIRD AU is one where, post-Civil War or post-Thanos (assuming he lives, IT IS REAL FUN ADDING THIS DISCLAIMER ON EVERY SPECULATION POST BTW), Steve decides he needs something different in his life. He’s tired of fighting. And he’s mindlessly searching the internet one day and he sees a “Steve Rogers vs Mr Rogers” comparison and it’s meant to mock- IDK, one of them or the other, the contrast is apparent, but Steve sees it and thinks shit, I could do that. It’s a way to be a good person and have people appreciate it rather than think it’s naive. He constructs the puppets himself and films a few episodes in his apartment and uploads them to YouTube, just as a joke. Within a week he has six offers for major money, but the only one he responds to is Mr Rogers’s estate, asking if he’d be interested in bringing that legacy back to public television. The sweater is different for him, as much a uniform as the Cap one had been, but he thinks this is a role he could learn to love. Probably he still has a Neighborhood of Make-Believe character named Bucky in this one too, even though the real Bucky is currently out there in the world, sidekicking for brand-new Captain America, Sam Wilson. After every episode airs Bucky calls with an array of colorful insults over what his character is doing, what the shit Rogers, I would never make that choice, and Steve tries a butter-wouldn’t-melt “Gosh, Buck, it’s just a fictional character” and the next time he sees him Bucky punches him in the face and Steve just grins because yeah, he deserves that.
THE THIRD ONE OF COURSE
I just imagine the entire fic being angry texts from Bucky.
WHY DID BUCKYPUPPET AGREE THAT IT’S GOOD TO FORGIVE PEOPLE? THAT’S BULLSHIT. BUCKYPUPPET SHOULD PROVE HIS DOMINANCE. RESHOOT THAT SEGMENT. SAMPUPPET SHOULD APOLOGIZE FOR EVER DOUBTING HIM. xoxo bucky
(Natasha set up his phone to sign everything with that and he can’t figure out how to undo it. Both Sam and Steve could undo it, but it’s much funnier this way.)
wupacing 