based on the assumption that human blood can survive in a vampire for about the same amount of time it can in a human body, vampires would only need to feed three or four times a year (red blood cells live about 110 days on average). this would be if they completely drained all their victims.
humans can survive losing up to about 40% of their blood, which means that a vampire pushing their limits with each victim would probably need to feed 12 times a year minimum
so like once a month
Hey guess what else happens once a month involving blood
omg no
Now that’s recycling
“Actually, period blood would be really good for a vampire; it’s incredibly nutritious, because it’s supposed to feed a foetus! And it’s probably the cleanest blood in the human body. It’s sterile.” My wife contributed.
My students are taking a midterm. And I’m shaking with laughter. Fuck. Too real. This post ruined my illusion of being a stoic teacher proctoring an exam.
not to take a joke post seriously but this is literally the ideal period humor because
1.) no gendered language
2.) no assumption that people only use tampons (weirdly prevalent??? in discussions about periods)
pro tip: before getting serious w a man, just casually mention ur period. like, just say ‘my cramps are bad rn’ or ‘I have to go buy some pads’. his reaction is very telling of how mature and understanding he is. you don’t wanna be dating a grown ass man who gets grossed out by the word menstruation. u deserve someone who is comfortable w u and I do mean all of u. you’ll be thanking urself for doing it now and not later hun!
THIS IS REALLY INDICATIVE OF HOW THEY FEEL ABOUT A LOT OF THINGS. TRUST ME.
True story. Once, I dated a guy once that wouldn’t let me pay for my own pads him he has with me. He wouldn’t go out and buy them himself if I needed them though. I had to stand next to him, which defeated the whole reason for him going to buy me any. Was uncomfortable with period talk and letting me pay for things myself.
Once, I also dated a guy that wouldn’t even stand in the pads alley with him. It grossed him out. Everything about my period grossed him out and he didn’t want to touch me. Just left me alone and didn’t want to deal with any of it. Wouldn’t even stand next to me when I bought pads.
Now, the guy I’m with and going to marry, he is a whole different story. I was dying of cramps and got my period while finishing up a class. (My campus can get very bad to the point where I’m shaking in pain or unable to move) Mistakenly didn’t bring pads and texted I needed him to do me the biggest favor. Not only did he buy me pads (something he does from time to time when I need them) but he marched through campus with them not bothering to hide it and brought me Advil.
Last week, I was dying in pain and lost my hot pack when I went to visit my mother. I asked him to buy me a new one and he forgot. So, I’m in massive pain near tears and it’s past ten at night wishing I hadn’t been so stupid as to lose it. He gets dressed and goes out to get me a hot pack even when I tell him over and over that I can wait until morning and I don’t want him to go not because he needs to go to bed.
He flat out says “I love you. You asked me to get you a hot pack and I forgot. Now, you are in a lot of pain and I can’t stand to see that. So, I’m getting you the hot pack and I’ll be back soon.” Comes back with the hot pack, ice cream and a candy bar.
Not saying all men need to be this level of nice. But I am saying that bring up your period in a casual manner is a great way to see how people will treat you when you are sick, not feeling well, or just basically how they handled things.
ACTUALLY THEY DO NEED TO BE THAT LEVEL OF NICE THOUGH
You are absolutely correct, and I was a fool not to realize it sooner.
My grampa was like this. I still remember sitting in the bathroom throwing up, because hella period nausea, and him holding my hair out of my face and like … not exactly rubbing my back. Sort of patting it. Like he was trying to be comforting but wasn’t quite sure how, because a 17-year-old girl throwing up and crying and telling him this was normal was outside his wheelhouse, which, given that he was in his 70s at the time and married my grandma when she was already in menopause, is understandable. Anyway, he went and called his niece for advice. She told him to give me plain herbal tea for pain (since Advil wasn’t staying down) and put me to bed, and he did and asked if I needed anything from the store, and went out and bought me pads and extra herbal tea, and called my school and told them I was sick and he was keeping me home.
If a man born in 1929 can pull it off, boys, so can you.
Ok look even though it’s been said a million times before,
Having
your first period
does NOT
make you
a woman.
I’m saying this because I’ve heard a recent surge around me in people saying girls “become a woman” when that happens and just…no?
I was 11. Fortunately I knew vague stuff about it before it happened to me. But for the most part, all I really got was “I’m an adult now because this means I can have kids.”
I was not an adult. I was a child. I still played with Polly Pockets. I had a 52-piece Littlest Pet Shop collection, and the goat was named Goatita because that’s how my brain worked. I wrote about my seventeen different crushes in purple pen in the first diary I ever owned without a lock. I used text abbreviations while writing by hand. I held royal tournaments with my Playmobil knights and had jousts and battles and feasts like in the books I read.
I had no emotional maturity. I had very little mental maturity. I couldn’t have in any way handled having a relationship. All I had was extra unwanted chest material, and a body that bled every few weeks, and the misconception that I ought to now be an adult when I was the farthest thing from one.
I was not a woman. I was a child. And that’s why arguments about periods=adulthood just make me mad, because the two are not equal and should never be equated.
Honestly the whole concepts of periods being the defining factor of womanhood needs to stop, not only because of the b.s. above but because of the transphobia b.s. as well. All a period means is that your body is doing a thing. It has no say on your identity.
When I was still in high school I went into the girls toilets one morning before classes started. I could hear this girl crying from one of the cubicles. When I asked her what was wrong she said to me “I just started my period. I don’t know what to do!” I asked her what she meant and she said “My mum can’t afford them. She said if this ever happened I have to go home right away” When I gave her one of the pads from my bag she literally hugged me so tight. she was sobbing while saying to me "Now I can stay at school thank you" That hit me so hard. I gave her my lunch money so she could buy her own. My cheese toastie means nothing to me at this point if I can give this one girl something she needs. Sanitary Products are not a luxury item. Period poverty is real. I’m so proud of my wee country right now.💙
This needs to be International, starting YESTERDAY.
I’ve said this before and I’ll point it out again –
Menstruation is caused by change in hormonal levels to stop the creation of a uterine lining and encourage the body to flush the lining out. The body does this by lowering estrogen levels and raising testosterone.
Or, to put it more plainly “That time of the month” is when female hormones most closely resemble male hormones. So if (cis) women aren’t suited to office at “That time of the month” then (cis) men are NEVER suited to office.
If you are a dude and don’t dig the ladies around you at their time of the month, just think! That is you all of the time.
And, on a final note, post-menopausal (cis) women are the most hormonally stable of all human demographics. They have fewer hormonal fluctuations of anyone, meaning older women like Hilary Clinton and Elizabeth Warren would theoretically be among the least likely candidates to make an irrational decision due to hormonal fluctuations, and if we were basing our leadership decisions on hormone levels, then only women over fifty should ever be allowed to hold office.
Reblogging hard for that last comment.
I WANTED TO SAY THIS BUT THEN SOMEONE ELSE DID and I’m damn proud.
wupacing 