wade would die for aunt may, ever since the day they first met and she brushed aside his handshake for a hug and left him speechless, he added may’s house to his regular patrols
wade still doesn’t talk to may as much as peter would like, he still tries to get out of visiting her, but it’s because every time he’s around her it takes everything he’s got just to keep from turning into a sobbing wreck
she’s like the mother he never had, she drops by their place all the time to drop off tupperwares full of food because she’s worried they aren’t eating right, she’s right of course
wade breaks into may’s place to do chores for her when she’s not home, like he used to do for peter before they moved in together, after she found out what wade was doing, she started leaving out plates of snacks and thank you cards that made wade cry, wade’s kept everything single one of those cards in a shoebox in the closet
may once tricked wade into going shopping with her, she said she wanted to get peter something for his birthday and she wanted wade’s help, so of course he couldn’t refuse, but instead of looking for a gift, she took wade to the mall and spent the whole time window shopping with him, she remembered how excited wade was in the lush store and when his birthday came around, he got a basket full of skin creams and lotions and bath bombs, she even beat out peter’s gift that year
the first time may told him he was family, peter was in the avenger’s icu, may had been brought in, and when wade started feeling out of place with everybody hovering over peter, he tried to leave, just to have may grab his hand and tell him to stay because he’s family
when wade decided to ask peter to marry him, he went to may for help, they went to the jewelry store together and picked out a ring, something simple and heartfelt, she helped him pick out a day and a place too
but he and peter got on their knees at the same time and started laughing when they both pulled out the same engagement ring, aunt may had played them both like a f
when they got home there was a gift from may already waiting for them, a note with her congratulations and a carefully wrapped glass, because “it was about time”
Peter Parker: -on meeting Loki, offers his hand- Hi, I’m Peter!
Loki: -shakes his hand- Loki of Asgard.
Peter: Aren’t you like…a bad guy?
Loki: It varies from moment to moment.
Peter: So like…on a scale of one to ten, ten being the worst evil imaginable, like…killing puppies, and one being I’ll spit on your hotdog…where are you right now?
Loki: …maybe a three?
Peter: Cool. Lemme know if it gets above a six.
Loki: -thinking- I like him.
It had been a joke, a flippant line, but somehow, Loki found himself taking the youth up on it.
It was hard living around these heroic Avengers, hard trying to stay close to Thor. And when he felt his need for mischief rise too high, when he felt exasperation with these Midgardians turn too close to spite, he would casually say “Six.” to the young man, or sometimes “Seven.”
And Peter would spend the rest of his day with Loki. He would badger him with questions about magic, or drag him across his beloved city to see its entertainments, or take him along stopping petty crimes. He grounded Loki to the here and now, and distracted him from the churning, jagged shards of ice in his mind.
WE NEED LOKI AND PETER FICS
Yeah, the people who write the comics agree with you
imagine if someone really pissed Loki off and he turns to Peter and just “IT’s A TEN, CHILD”
Peter Parker: -on meeting Loki, offers his hand- Hi, I’m Peter!
Loki: -shakes his hand- Loki of Asgard.
Peter: Aren’t you like…a bad guy?
Loki: It varies from moment to moment.
Peter: So like…on a scale of one to ten, ten being the worst evil imaginable, like…killing puppies, and one being I’ll spit on your hotdog…where are you right now?
Loki: …maybe a three?
Peter: Cool. Lemme know if it gets above a six.
Loki: -thinking- I like him.
It had been a joke, a flippant line, but somehow, Loki found himself taking the youth up on it.
It was hard living around these heroic Avengers, hard trying to stay close to Thor. And when he felt his need for mischief rise too high, when he felt exasperation with these Midgardians turn too close to spite, he would casually say “Six.” to the young man, or sometimes “Seven.”
And Peter would spend the rest of his day with Loki. He would badger him with questions about magic, or drag him across his beloved city to see its entertainments, or take him along stopping petty crimes. He grounded Loki to the here and now, and distracted him from the churning, jagged shards of ice in his mind.
WE NEED LOKI AND PETER FICS
“Brother, why does young Parker have a gravity emulator ball?”
“Why would I know?”
“Because when I asked him, he said you’d told him it was a toy. Loki, that’s a weapon of war.”
“And?”
“Are you trying to usurp Stark as the boy’s mentor?”
Loki looked up from his phone (when did he get one of those?) to take an obnoxious sip from his frappe.
“Look, he’s a smart kid. He can handle it. I really don’t care about it that much.”
There was a loud bang from the other side of the room, and the brothers looked over to see Peter (and the couch) pinned to the ceiling, the gravity orb thauming angrily in midair.
“Mr. Loki? I’m uh. I’m kind of stuck.”
Thor snorted and let a small tongue of lightning flick from his fingers to deactivate the orb, and everything crashed back to the floor. Loki shot up in his seat, peering over to see if the couch had crushed him.
“I’m okay!” Peter yelled
Thor stifled a laugh “You don’t care?”
“Not. A. Word.” Hissed Loki, already planning to stab his brother for the third time that week.
peter parker, expressing his affection as any teen would: thor i would die for you 🙂
thor, gripping his shoulders with the intensity of ten thousand burning suns: i would never let that happen
peter parker, later that week: i would die for you loki
loki, looking him dead in the eye: you will.
drax: [really bad joke]
peter parker: mr. drax? I would die for you
drax, with a pause spent determining that peter is probably joking and then a hearty guffaw: but my muscles and fighting power is several times your own! your death would be meaningless!
peter parker, in the middle of battle with no regard for his own safety: i would die for you
t’challa, who has lived with shuri long enough to know exactly what answer peter is looking for: then perish
there’s a special place in my heart for tabloids that are straight up slander
It all makes sense now… Iron Man and Spiderman both have the same last name…….
the proof is out there
Rhodes tells all is my absolute fave part bci love the idea of rhodey eating a pizza on the couch in avengers tower, taking revenge on tony for screwing with his suit, TMZ on speaker, going: ‘ya, the kid’s his son [chewing] who’s the mother? [more chewing] uhhh black widow [chewing] they’re both spiders, you see. [taking a sip from his soda] why it didn’t work out? well, tony cheated on her with uhhh [steve walks in, waves at rhodey] with captain america. yeah it was very bad for team morale.’
As much as I dislike gossip rags, if I lived in the MCU I would be a regular subscriber of super hero tabloids.
“Listen, Cap and I have our differences but I have enough respect for him to put that aside and mark down his exact time of death.”
“Oh my god.”
“All I’m saying is Hydra’s been trying since the forties but Captain America was murdered in cold blood right here right now by a high schooler.”
“Tony—“
“The ice couldn’t even do it but that’s because no amount of arctic ice in the world could measure up to the iconic freezer burn my kid just gave him.”
wupacing 