I always found it a bit odd. Hilarious, but it raised too many questions. When did Steve make these? Why did Steve make these? How did he manage to be so cheesy and overly sincere knowing how much crap he would get from the other Avengers for it?
Well, today my sister told me her headcanon. Picture the scene. Steve leans on the back of a chair, as above. Peter immediately launches into ‘So, you got detention…’. Cap blinks. Peter awkwardly tries to explain. It turns out Cap has no idea what videos he means, and neither do any of the other Avengers.
So they get in touch with the company who made them, and they swear blind that it was really the real Captain America, and that it all his idea. That he came in and said how much he wanted to help the youth of today.And the Avengers all lose it because someone is running around doing an unbelievably good impression of Captain America, they could have destroyed his reputation, they could have infiltrated the Avengers; and instead all they are apparently using it for is to make silly, embarrassing videos.
It’s completely baffling. Who could possibly be behind it all?
“Listen, Cap and I have our differences but I have enough respect for him to put that aside and mark down his exact time of death.”
“Oh my god.”
“All I’m saying is Hydra’s been trying since the forties but Captain America was murdered in cold blood right here right now by a high schooler.”
“Tony—“
“The ice couldn’t even do it but that’s because no amount of arctic ice in the world could measure up to the iconic freezer burn my kid just gave him.”
tell me again about how peggy carter never taught steve rogers how to fight?
you
clearly
aren’t
paying
enough
attention
dear
What I love about this in an odd way is that all of these fighting techniques tend to be used by smaller and weaker people. In the first two: you get them off balance, take them by surprise. In three and four: incapacitating someone so they can’t continue to harm you. Five and six: again, surprise and using nearby objects because if they can’t get to you, they can’t hit you. Finally, the last two: overturn their center of gravity, get them off balance, get them to fall. These are all things Steve should have been taught before he went standing up to bullies and they are all things that Peggy Carter made sure he knew when he was big enough to keep bullies from hurting other people.
She taught Steve before he was big. She didn’t know (and if she had an idea, she definitely didn’t know for certain) that he was ever going to get big. She taught little Steve Rogers how to fight, because everyone else at basic training treated his presence like a joke, and because she was hands down the most qualified.
Or course Steve already knew how to fight, but he knew how to fight like a big muscular person, which he wasn’t. Most of his knowledge of fighting came from being hit by other people, by bigger people, by men. You can bet Bucky tried to teach him, but Bucky was big and strong and not qualified to know what would work best for STEVE.
Peggy Carter taught Steve to fight within his abilities, within his limitations, USING his size to his advantage. Be fast, be resourceful, bend your knees and get low and use their momentum against them, and when it gets serious fight dirty.
Peggy Carter taught Steve Rogers to fight like a woman, and that is why he always fucking wins.
god im just thinking about how much going to public school in the MCU would’ve made me hate captain america. every time i got caught giving some bitch the finger or writing on bathroom walls or ditching class or stealing books from the library cause i got a fine or what have you, and then they gave me lunch detention or ISS and i sat in that dumbass eraser-smelling room and im in My Chair (the chair i always sit in and yell at anyone else who tries to take it), fuming, arms crossed, full of teen angst and hating everyone around me, and AGAIN had to watch this stupid fucking video ive already seen so many times that i know it by heart and every word grates on my eardrums and i’d just see this fuckin familiar face
and i would be ready to LOSE MY SHIT
Villain Origin Story
god imagine Steve giving Peter his Captain America is Disappointed in You face/lecture over something dumb and Peter just fucking dissociating and zoning back in to “Peter! Are you even listening to me???” and looking him in the eye and being like “I’m completely immune at this point. You can’t even touch me.” and walking the fuck away
canon.
the real reason why Peter agreed to fight cap at the airport
wupacing 