I think what bothers me the most about a lot of the negative press surrounding Jupiter Ascending is that we’re basically busting on it for not being for boys.
Sure, the fiim has problems – I’m not denying that. But a lot of the story-based criticisms revolve around the notion that it does a poor job of articulating the standard Chosen Hero narrative, when the fact of the matter is that it’s not meant to be a Chosen Hero story. It’s meant to be a Secret Princess story – you know, the one where the heroine has a terrible life until a handsome knight (who’s totally scary at first, but kind and brave at heart) appears and tells her that this isn’t how it’s meant to be, that she’s actually the lost princess of some far-off land, and that he’s come to take her home.
And you know what the thing about the Secret Princess narrative is? It’s every bit the adolescent power fantasy that the Chosen Hero narrative is – it’s just one that’s historically been much more popular among girls than it is among boys. And I think that’s the crux of why it’s been so widely misidentified: hundred-million-dollar action blockbusters based on specifically girl-directed power fantasies do not happen. In fact, I’m having trouble thinking of any action film founded in the Secret Princess narrative before Jupiter Ascending came along, big-budget or otherwise.
A lot of the popular criticisms fall apart when you look at it through that lens. Jupiter “lacks agency” because she doesn’t fight? Of course she doesn’t fight. The Princess doesn’t get her hands dirty in battle if it can be avoided; that’s what her knight is for. She’s got bigger things to worry about: the fate of nations – or, in this case, of worlds – rests in her hands. And does Jupiter Jones acquit herself well in this arena? You’re darn right she does. The only way you can argue that she “lacks agency” is if you presume that the only decisions that count are those that are enacted by personally hitting somebody in the face. Which would be true, if this were a Chosen Hero story – but it isn’t.
Basically, at this point we’re not criticising the film for how it tells its story: we’re criticising it for the kind of story it’s telling. Certain types of stories are regarded as intrinsically unworthy of cinematic attention – and isn’t it funny how virtually all stories aimed at girls fall into that category? Certainly, Jupiter Ascending is by no means above reproach – but we can’t even talk about what it does right or wrong as a film, because we’re stuck on arguing about whether it has any right to exist as a film in the first place.
Pennychaos watchalongs at the forest cabin! Penny has seen the episodes before, chaos has not. MINOR SPOILERS, obvs.
Penny says: the EXPRESSIONS. Such glee, such disregard. The case in the first episode isn’t always well handled though. A rather random murder and protracted denouement.
Clearly, says Nurse Chaos, the best thing was her sound sensitivity. A certain lack of social sensitivity. A diagnosis will take a bit longer, but we have some nice symptomology here. With any luck, the following episodes will have some additional, delightful little details to add to this interesting portrayal of a woman who is actually allowed to be tactless, rude, brilliant and brutal, and still manages to get her way. Not bad. Oh, and yes, there was a case somewhere too, I recall. And dead bodies. But we all know we’re not primarily here for that, don’t we? It’s all about the characters. And the aesthetics, of course. And perhaps about the small psychological details. And the big, smug expressions on Sherlock’s face at seemingly random times. But yes: there was some case and a lot of very dramatic screaming. Impressively dramatic, to be frank. Another important detail was 221B. Beautifully done. Wato-san was very different in this version; more of an innocent, less raw and damaged (so far; I still have hope for a suitably dysfunctional Watson in this version…).
All in all, I’m pleasantly surprised. Very much so.
It’s been over four years since Almost Human was canceled after one season. In looking it up today to remind my generally science fiction-hating sister who also loved it (as did my entire family—which usually only happens with sitcoms) that it’s gone, I found an article about “terrible shows” that Fox canceled. I admit, outwardly it does just seem like a buddy cop drama with a twist, but even if that was all it offered, have we as an audience actually tired of the trope?
This time, we got human cops who must be paired with android partners. How is that not a fun twist on the buddy cop genre?
Anyway, here are just a few reasons in no particular order why I’m still bitter (some of them are for the Great Shipping™, just so you’re forewarned):
Karl Urban and Michael Ealy were fantastic together! Amazing chemistry!
Subverted the human and robot dynamics (super soft android who is great with kids and wants to talk about issues while the human is closed off and wants to pretend feelings don’t exist)
The specific android that Dorian (Ealy) plays is a type that has been replaced in the police department and because they’re “too emotional” so now most cops have these boring nobody unfeeling androids instead
Cute silly moments like them singing Elton John’s “Bennie and the Jets” together
Emmy-nominated special effects (You read that correctly: Amazing top-notch special effects on a non-premium science fiction television show. It was a fucking gift.)
Fox aired the episodes out of order so it was confusing to watch when it aired and therefore harder for the audience to follow (just like they did for Firefly, etc.)
The ethical dilemmas of the future (including sex bots, genetically-engineered children, etc.)
Strong female police captain who is not all hard edges but actually sweet and considerate as well
Good cast in general
Rudy! Played by the guy from Pirates of the Caribbean who has the fake eye/some dude in Game of Thrones. He’s a techie who loves the androids and is cute with Dorian and gives us nice comic relief. (I love him, even if he is a little bit pervy.)
An actual quote from a scene in “Are You Receiving?” (what a title):
KENNEX (Human, Karl Urban): Hold this. And this.
DORIAN (Android, Michael Ealy): What am I doing here?
KENNEX: You’re heating my coffee. Hey! I like it hot.
DORIAN: It’s best between 155 and 175 degrees, most people prefer it at 175. You like it at 165, and that’s what it is.
KENNEX: You know how I like my coffee?
DORIAN: Yes, I, unlike you, pay attention to details, like what time it is and what time you’re supposed to pick up your partner for shift.
KENNEX: Oh, I pay attention to details, like you just put your finger in my coffee.
DORIAN: If you’d like, I could put it somewhere else.
(!!! A fucking fingering joke? Are you kidding me? I could die.)
Things Dorian the android is confirmed to have:
A “synthetic soul” (ROBOT WITH A SOUL)
A dick (ROBOT WITH CONFIRMED GENITALS) (The replacement cop robots do not have dicks, just FYI.)
There was just generally a lot of cool future stuff and the plot was good and the characters and their relationships develop nicely (if you watch in the correct order) and it left off with a cliffhanger about Dorian’s creator and what was on the other side of the wall and now we’ll never know and I’m angry
Also, it had a lot of inspiration from Blade Runner but it was modern-futuristic with way more POC
Oh yeah, the human cop lost his leg and has PTSD and has an electronic android leg that he has trouble dealing with
Dorian tells him to lube himself up with olive oil to help. And then later comments when he knows John did (*Martha Stewart voice* It’s a good thing)
It was just fucking cool
All in all, it was fantastic and, to be honest, we probably didn’t deserve it since I remember literally seeing people comment at the time that it was too unbelievable for Dorian to have trouble being accepted because he’s a robot when the bigger issue is that he’s black. Like, yikes. Humans are terrible.
Anyway, if you want to legally experience this treasure, it’s available for purchase on Amazon (DVD or digital), but the episodes are still out of order, so check here for the correction (through the production order numbers). Or just, like, illegally download it or stream it because it probably makes no difference at this point. 😦
(I have some far-fetched hope that somehow this will get renewed by someone else still, but I know the likelihood is probably less than zero percent. So, like, just suffer with me.)
Thanks for reading my long rant. The end.
We all suffer with you and hope that one day we can at least get a film to tie up all the hanging plot threads.
Fellow sufferer here. Everyone I know loved the show, too, and it was the critic’s choice for best new show. Michael Ealy got a nomination for best actor, and makeup won an award. It scored a steady 6 million viewers while up against the two most popular shows on TV that year: The Voice and the final season of How I Met Your Mother AND it ran against the Olympics when every other show went on hiatus. Not only was it aired out of order, but there were two 3 week breaks in airing in a 13 ep show. FOXTV OUTBID the other networks for the show (if another network had won it, I’m sure it would still be on the air) and then killed it, deliberately, because they didn’t want to honour the contract and wanted more money. Greedy bastards. So, an excellent show, holding its own despite ongoing sabotage and pretty much no advertising. I too hope for a movie someday to tie up loose ends. I hope Michael Ealy gets so successful as a producer that he’ll be the one to make it, in partnership with Joel (the creator). In the meantime, I hope FOXTV goes bankrupt.
PS! Folks!
I just checked and Almost Human is on iTunes. So if you want another way to register your support for this TV show, you can buy the season and watch!
This is the first black woman director in #CannesFilmFestival jury in all of its history . And she is dropping gems everywhere.
#AvaDuVernay #FemaleFilmmakerFriday
argentina: ni idea, pero es un pendejo (idk, but he is a pendejo)
méxico:
(pendejo in mex = insult. pendejo in arg= young boy)
méxico: wait a sec, i’m gonna eat a concha.
argentina:
(concha in mex = a type of bread. concha in arg = pussy)
spanish woman: hi, my name is concha
argentina:
(concha in spain = seashell and a female name. concha in arg = pussy)
mex: i love cajeta, it’s so sweet!
arg:
(cajeta in mex = dulce de leche [caramel]; cajeta in arg = pussy)
spanish speaker: h-
argentina: thats pussy, babe!!
So, Argentina is the Australia of the Spanish speaking world?
I don’t….i don’t think that anglos understand.
This is not about México or Argentina….this is about this:
EVERY SINGLE ONE of the countries of Latinoamerica has this problem. Yes, Brasil too (portuguese and spanish are really similar…until they are not, so you have one word with two different meanings in a stracture that its the same in both languages). Some words are shared, some words are not, a country can have 215 dialects depending the region, there’s a lot of mixed up dialects/languages in the limits with the other country….
If you are from here and you are used to talk w inmigrants/in the internet, you already know that if you talk with someone from another region/country you are gonna insult them or say something really dirty. It’s a fact, a curse, no one can avoid misunderstandings. Here are some examples:
“Oh, how hard it’s to understand spanish. If you learn it, stay in only one region!”
“Straw has over 20 different words, and all of them mean something dirty to somebody”
“what about torta? for some people that it’s vagina too, but it’s just a sandwich here” (i’m from Argentina, here means cake or lesbian)
and it’s not only with “dirty words”….daily words are all mixed up too.
“FRE-SAS” “FRU-TI-LLAS”
So, the next time that all of you anglos/gringos fight about “color” or “colour”…
you will hear all the latines laughing in the background
wupacing 