I had physio tonight, and Magic Physio has resorted to sarcastically repeating back the things I say that are counter productive to my physical well being, just so I can hear how ridiculous it sounds.
He’s told me several times over the last few months that the damage in my shoulders is consistent with someone working at a desk that’s too high for them, and tonight I was like “I know it’s an issue but I figure I can just put up with a little longer” and he very pointedly dug his fingers in under my shoulder blade like, “oh, you figure you can just put up with repeatedly damaging your body. Interesting, interesting…huh”
Like, well, when you say it like that…
He also used my arm to wave at someone who was leaving while he was working on my range of motion, and only realized what he’d done when I piped up with “hiho, Kermit the frog here”, which caused him to lose his shit while also apologizing profusely for using me like a puppet.
“I’m sorry, I didn’t even realize. Your arm was just there where my mine ended, it felt like the logical follow through.”
So y’know. I need to make getting a new desk a priority and I might be mind merging with my physical therapist, but overall a pretty standard Tuesday night.
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For those asking, the collection of “Things my physio has said to me”:
I have this thing I call the Two Rogers Rule of Manliness: Basically, if Steve or Fred wouldn’t do it, neither should I. It’s stupid, it’s simplistic, and it’s geeky, but it works.
if you’re american and coming to australia, I’m gonna go ahead and say that you should be 100 percent way more worried about being king hit by a dude named “dane” in a bintang singlet than any fucking spiders that exist here
what does this say in english
“Good sir, if you are a resident of the United States of America and coming to visit the sunny land of Australia, allow me to inform you that you should be rather more concerned about being sucker punched by a gentleman named ‘Dane’ who is likely to be seen wearing a wifebeater with a beer company logo on it than by any of the dangerous spiders that exist on this lovely continent”.
ok so what does it say in american
“You’re more likely to get sucker punched/cold-cocked by an asshole than you are to be bitten by a spider”.
thank you
Well rattle my spoons, that don’t make a lick of sense. Wot in tarnation does this hootenanny say?
“If ya mosey on by Australia, you best be fixin’ to get to some fisticuffs more’n checkin fer spiders.”
In the Legend of Korra, the Metal Clan tried teaching Bolin how to metal bend to no avail. But it turned out that he had another even more impressive ability all along. Lava bending.
Sometimes you just need time, patience, and a sturdy patoot to find out what your special skill might be.
Irish catholics: filled with shame always, are guilt singularities, deeply fearful of their mam’s finding out they didn’t go to mass.
Scottish catholics: healthy amount of guilt and shame, usually chill, same as the irish re: the mammy thing though.
French catholics: no shame, some guilt, guilt coped with by smoking.
Italian catholics: a bit of guilt, lots of fucking, lots of shame about said fucking.
Eastern eauropean catholics: not quite guilt or shame, more an all encompassing sense of dread. Unparalleled art and architecture though. Like honestly, amazing.
English catholics: fake and do not know god, most likely to burn on holy ground, most likely to commit arson.
specifically polish catholics: no guilt, no shame, lots of pent-up anger, will probably crucify you in the name of jesus, would spit at actual jesus and call him a filthy rat.
Mexican Catholics: guilt, self sacrifice, don’t have sex or you’ll die (but everyone does it anyway), pray to very specific saints to help with very particular issues, Virgin Mary is the real boss here, also death cult but in a happy way.
wupacing 